The Tactless Diplomats

Posting Access:
All Members
I hereby proclaim this as a bulletin board of sorts for The Tactless Diplomats. Invites will be sent out to "current" members I have email address for and the rest will have to apply for membership. Your application will be shared with other members and be decieded among us. This is pretty much so that I feel special. Like a bouncer at a hip new club. I've got the guest list, are you on it?
This group was brought together by our love of Law and Order : Special Victims Unit and Chris Meloni's ass.
We pride ourselves in witty sarcasm, hilarious banter and general disdain for stupid people.
If you are easily offended, or offended by things such as fisting, masturbation, dead bodies, and booze I would recommend you stay clear of the community.
Most important of all, you must be a smart-ass. You can post your application on the actual community board and we will decide from there. Please put "Llamas are teh smex" in the subject heading of your application. That way I'll know you have read the rules.

Here are some easy rules.

1. Don't be an asshole. Actually, no. Be a complete dickhead if you feel it's needed.
2. Fill out the questions below along with at least 2 pictures. Post as many as you want, as long as their behind aLJ cut
. I cannot stress enough how annoying it is to sit and wait for some dumbass's 38 pictures to load.
3. Don't Bring your personal business into here or you might get some smart ass remarks. (kinda the point in this community so actually, bring it on!) If that happens, dont be crying to one of the moderators. If it gets to be a serious issue, contact the mods, we will figure out whats goin on, and hopefull resolve it.
4. Dont take the shit said in here seriously we are all smart assess. So take everything with a grain of salt

And now, for the application:
Nicknames (explain):
Favorite color(s):
Favorite band(s):
Favorite movie(s):
Favorite book(s):
Favorite author(s):
Have you ever broken the law? If so what did you do?:
Are you for or against gay marriage?:
What's your favorite smiley?:
If you could be a color, what color and why?:
What do you want to do in the future?:
Everyone is racist; if you could pick one race to hate, which would it be?:
What is your philosophy?:
Have you ever burnt down an orphanage?:
Tell us a good joke:
How many real life best friends do you truly have?:
How many real life enemies do you truly have?:
Make up the first paragraph of a story. It can be humorous, dramatic, sad whatever, it must include one animal, one person, one place, a tree, a weapon, and a sexual innuendo:
Where is your job located and what do you do?:
If you lose everything you love, what are you?:
Have you ever encouraged/persuaded/assisted suicide?:
Have you ever punched someone in the face? If so, who, if not, why not?
What's your favorite cussword?:
Have you ever been lost in the forest?:
What's your favorite eating utensil?:
I know a guy who accidentally pushed his aunt down the stairs and she went into the hospital and died a couple days later. Has this, or anything similar to this, ever happened to you?:
What about you is smartass?:
What are your habits?:
If you had to choose, which gender's genitilia would you rather have your face resemble?:
Would you ever jump on the back of an ethiopian child that was raped by his father and hasnt eaten in 3+ weeks?:
Name one smartass thing you say:
When you hear the word "phallic", what do you think of?:
If you could be any parasitic worm, what would you be and why?:
If you had to have an STD, which would it be? If you already have an STD, put that and explain:
Do you smoke?:
If you were about to have sex and took off your partner's clothes only to discover they have male/female (whichever you don't prefer) genitilia, what would you do? If you're bi, write "I'd fuck a dog even.":
Do you know what anal beads are?:
What's your best pickup line?:
Which pickup line works better.. "Your body is 90% water. Also, I'm Jewish. Aren't you on TV?" or "Your father must have been a thief, because I saw him stealing candy from a K-Mart"?:
Name a modern-day film classic:
One food that gives you the runs:
What do you call it when a woman "whacks off"?:
What is your opinion on porn? Go into detail:
Convince us of something completely absurd:
How many digits are in your phone number?:
YES OR NO: Do you ever think about death, the answer to all our problems?
Explain in detail why you have sex with goats:
In your opinion who today is the most smartass person in the world and why?:
Whats the stupidest thing you've ever done?
Show us some pictures of you:
Show us a smartasss picture not of you cuz you're not smartass: